Tombstones and Team building

 By Gill Khoury

 Who would have guessed that a team building exercise, requiring the participants to write epitaphs for one another, would be the highlight of a tremendous weekend?

 It proved to be exactly that for the pastoral team of Kwazulu Natal and Umtata. The weekend, which took place from 25 to 27 January 2003, was initiated by Gordon and Marilys Green, and the goal was to bond seven couples from all over the East Coast (South Africa) into a team that would drive the region forward over the next few years. The mix was diverse in both age and background, and included Jock and Merle Bennie from the South Coast, Rose and Sergie Subiah (Mandini), Chris and Marguerite Rogers (Pietermaritzburg), Sam and Agnes Biyela (Mandini), Thomas and Constance Masela (Umtata) and Chris and Gill Khoury (Durban).

The weekend began on Friday evening with praise and worship. This was followed by an exercise requiring each of us to say:

a)      what we would do if we won the lotto.

b)      who we would choose if we could have dinner with any three people.

The range of answers was incredibly diverse and began to highlight the fact that perhaps we didn’t know each other as well as we thought.

Saturday continued with more praise and worship.Then Gordon addressed the issues of transparency and the pastor’s role in the light of Psalm 23. According to Rose Subiah, this step by step guide to pastoring was very effective. Discussion revolved around the balance between pastoral care and active leadership of the churches in the region. The same afternoon Chris Rogers covered the subject of budgets and financial management in the local churches.

Saturday night brought us face to face with our tombstones. This exercise began fairly seriously, but eventually produced gales of laughter when Merle Bennie announced that on her tombstone she wanted “I told you I was sick!” After that it was humour all the way. However, what the exercise did provide was a clear summary of the personalities and strengths within the team, highlighting the natural talents. Some are clearly evangelists, others pioneers, others administrators. Some are spontaneous, other more cautious, but each has a role to play in Kwazulu Natal and Umtata and we need each other.

Sunday morning paved the way for the most serious discussion of the weekend. How are the churches in the regions? What problems do we face? How can we operate more effectively and efficiently? Are we all teaching the same theology with regard to the New Covenant?

After the team building exercises, all felt they were able to be honest and frank without fear of judgement. There was a great deal of consensus on many issues and a sense of respect and commitment to the regions. The conference ended with an inspiring and meaningful communion service.

All the pastoral teams wanted to repeat the exercise on an annual basis and to quote Jock Bennie, “there was a large amount of bonding, and the whole weekend went very well.”

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